Only A Mother...

Only a Mother . . .

• Can listen to the same knock-knock joke 27 times without hollering "Nobody's Home."
  
  
• Will be a Scrabble partner with a kid who thinks "cookie" begins with "k."
  
  
• Will unwind 56 feet of toilet paper so her little darling can have the empty roll... to make a Mother's Day present.
  
  
• Knows the location of every drive-through window in town.
  
  
• Knows the exact temperature a crayon will melt on the dashboard.
  
  
• Will try to hide a leafy green vegetable in a cookie.
  
  
• Knows the secret to happy grocery shopping with a toddler...visit the bakery aisle first and plug his lips with a big cream horn.
  
  
• Can cherish the 1,000th bleating of "Twinkle, Twinkle" from a budding violinist.
  
  
• Will show up at work wearing Mickey Mouse stickers on her posterior.
  
  
• Sees a Picasso in those scribbles decorating the fridge.
  
  
• Knows all the verses to "This Old Man."
  
  
• Can deal out emergency lunch money from the dryer lint filter.
  
  
• Can find her last good pair of panty hose hitching a wagon to a tricycle.
  
  
• Knows the sure-fire way to get three kids to eat carrots. buy two carrots.
  
  
• Is limber enough to wrestle a fitted sheet onto the top bunk bed.
  
  
• Invests fifty dollars in stale macaroons to help send the French Club to Disneyland.
  
  
• Will attempt to grow hydroponic tomatoes in one night for a last- minute science project.
  
  
• Can see across town and locate a missing shoe from her office desk phone.
  
  
• Can switch from cook to catcher in an instant.
  
  
• Has a bathtub that's filled with little yellow duckies.
  
  
• Seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie.