The "If Only" Zone

I'm sure I'm not the only one that's made questionable decisions. I'm also sure that every person that has made one wishes he or she could undo them and start again. Unfortunately, God made our own personal time clocks go forward instead of backward. With age comes regret, and with regret comes a better understanding of the mistakes we made in those decisions. Some will haunt us until eternity even if they're covered by the blood of Jesus. Some probably altered our lifestyles or affected our family. Yet, there's not one thing we can do physically to undo or change them. We have to live with whatever decisions we have made in the past and try and make the best out of them.

That's a hard thing for most of us. We begin to live in that "if only" zone of grief and despair because we can't change things around like we wish we could. That "if only" zone is an area that questions every decision, good or bad, that you ever made. It causes you to wonder about things you want to forget and brings to you memories that you thought were buried. I think so much of the pain we see in people today is because they're living in the "if only" zone and can't seem to get out of that locale.

That's why having a relationship with Jesus is so important. You can't undo yesterday's bad decisions, but you can live forgiven and as an overcomer in Jesus name. Christ died for the sins of yesterday, today, and forever. It's because of Him your bad decisions don't have to control your life. They don't have the final authority over you if you surrender your past to Him. He is faithful to forgive you of all your past and able to move you into a glorious and bright future.

The locale of "if only" is a hard place to leave. It's like a barren wilderness filled with searing heat and no shade. It's like a dry, thirsty place where there is no comfort or peace. Some people live in hell on earth because of that horrible place. They constantly relive the chaos caused by their bad decisions and never find a place of rest. Hear these simple words-Your Past Has NO Bearing On Your Future In JESUS! He has forgiven and forgotten and can help you deal with those bad decisions if you trust Him. So instead of wandering in the "if only" zone, draw close to Him. He can bind every wound caused by those bad decisions and set you free. Your stake in your future is not found in your past, but in the salvation of Jesus, who will lead out of the "if only" zone.

If A Pastor

Pastors go through so much more than people realize. They are expected to be all things to all people, but we're just as human as the rest of you. I heard these things said about pastors during my 45 years of pastoral ministry. When I heard these things spoken I went through all kinds of emotions because I'm sure somebody said some of the same things about me. I'm sure other pastors could add to this list as well. Words can kill a pastor's influence quicker than any other weapon and these are just a few things that I heard and still hear today.

If a pastor:

-Expresses his feelings concerning a business matter, he's trying to get his way. If he sits silently and lets others speak on the matter, then he was dumb or had lost interest in the project.

-Is in his office preparing messages or studying, why doesn't he get out and learn what's going on with his people. Or if he was out visiting when someone called, why was he not tending to church business, or studying for a message?

-Wasn't at home at night, he's out having a good time with his family. If he was home resting, he's neglecting important outside contacts and activities of the church.

-Didn't agree with everything his members wanted to do, he was bullheaded. If he did agree, he didn't have any ideas of my own.

-Didn't do all that he was requested to do, he's a very poor pastor. If he did agree, well, that's what he was paid for.

-Gave someone a short answer, he was "too big for my britches." If he attempted to explain the pros and cons of an issue, he was a know-it-all.

-Was well dressed, he thought he was a big shot. If he wasn't, he was a poor representative of his position.

-Pastored a church for only a short time, he was inexperienced. If he'd been there a long time, it was time for a change.

Pastors are not perfect. We make errors, mistakes, and sometimes let our feelings interfere with our faith. But don't judge us on the fact that we are human beings subject to the same failures that you are subject too. We are not perfect, but we are trying our best to do what we can to make a difference. If you speak any kind of words, let them encouraging. If every pastor knew he had the backing of his church members things would be a lot different in every church. Pray for your pastor and love him/her. Don't speak ill of things you have no true knowledge of. You, he, and the church will be a lot better off!

Shamgar

The Bible is literally filled with wonderful heroes. Yet, most people have heard very few sermons preached about the man named Shamgar. Shamgar gets 2 verses in all of the Bible. Just 42 words are said about Shamgar in Judges 3:31 and 5:6. Yet this man’s story is so important that one of my favorite books was written about him in 2004 by Pat Williams, Jay Strack, and Jim Denny. If you've never read this book, The Three Success Secrets of Shamgar , I challenge you to read it today. I think it's one of the most powerful works of literature ever written to encourage pastors and churches in our generation.

In the book the authors share three principles that they derived from Shamgar and I want to emphasize those points in my blog today. I believe the Lord laid this upon my heart because some believe that their inadequacies in ministry are best left unknown and undisturbed. They talk a good game, but fail to finish what God has called them to do because of various circumstances. These three principles of Shamgar encourage us to make the best out of what God has given us and trust God when it comes to our personal shortcomings.

What are those three success secrets of Shamgar?

-You start where you are.
My son laughs at me some times when I use personal references regarding myself, but I know me better than anyone else. I also know that many people, regardless of their spiritual status, like to be recognized and make advances in any profession. I found out through personal experience that some advances are of your own choosing and God has very little to do with them. You think you are following the leading of the Lord, but you allowed other influences to make you hear what you want to hear so you can make that advance. Shamgar just made up his mind that he was not going to give up or in to the enemy's advances. He blotted out every thought that said "Retreat" or "Move" and started his defense of the territory that God gave him right where he was. He believed right where he was he could defeat the enemy.

How about you? Have you gotten discouraged like I did in the past and thought that moving was the answer? Have you allowed other voices to supersede the voice of God about leaving your territory? Shamgar, according to Jewish tradition, was just a farmer. He was not a skilled warrior, but a tiller of the land. Yet, he refused to think about going somewhere else because he was convinced, if he was going to stop the enemy, the place where he was located was the best place to start. I always heard it said at camp meeting every year by a night evangelist things were about to change in your ministry. I am convinced now they would have many years ago if I had stayed where I should have and trusted God to do what needed to be done.

-You use what you've got.

Too many times we've tried to make a silk purse out of a sow's ear. It just doesn't work. I know people and churches get into a frozen mindset and it will drive a pastor crazy. He or she goes to a seminar and the speaker's tell you all kind of stuff that worked for them and inspires them to go home and try it in their church. When they do and it doesn't work the enemy begins to work in or through people and problems begin. Our society has changed so much that some of our methods and ways of the past don't affect people any more, but convincing a congregation of that can be mind-blowing. On the other hand, changing a bunch of what did work to satisfy your personality can backfire as well. So do what Shamgar did. Take what you've got and use it. All he had was an ox-goad. No sword, spear, or shield-just an ox-goad; but with it he slew six hundred men and delivered Israel. Whatever your ox-goad is, find it, and use it to the best of your ability to slay the enemy and deliver your church.

-You do what you can.

The worst mistake I ever made was to try to do more than I was capable of. Nobody wants to admit their weaknesses, but I had mine and failed to recognize them until it was too late physically. So many think that to change the world people have to become like them, but it  really doesn't work that way. God didn't call us to save everybody, but to preach the gospel to every creature. We can't handle every problem that people face and there is no shame in admitting that. Just like Shamgar you do what you can when you can and in some you will make a difference. Some will fall through the cracks and some you will never please no matter what you do. If you do more than you're able it will catch up to you someday spiritually, mentally, and physically. All you can be is the person God called you to be and all you can do is the best that you can for His glory.

I marvel at my peers who have long-standing pastorates. They may not admit it, but they have lived by these Shamgar principles and their longevity at their churches has proved they work. Some have been through splits, seen the backsliding of faithful people they never thought would fail, and suffered through gossip and lies that would make you blush. They've faced financial crisis, ruin, and despair, but they stood their ground, have used what was given them, and done the best they could to defend God's territory. Let our prayer be that God will raise up more Shamgars in America and in the church today.

Dancing In The Dark

So many feel like their life is one of constant mourning and they live consistently in a place filled with failures. It's as if they're imprisoned in a dark, damp dungeon with no way out like Paul was many times in his ministry. Jesus came to give us restoration and a chance to celebrate our way out of the darkness and back into the light. He gave us the ability to dance in the dungeon and then put that season of failure behind us.


We often look at people who seem so full of life, that are rich, powerful, successful, popular, and we think, "Wow, they must be so fulfilled with their lives." Then we're amazed when we hear of a multi-millionaire who commits suicide or a famous movie star/athlete who over-doses on drugs. This truly reveals the emptiness of being in that dark dungeon, where nothing in this life can truly satisfy the soul. You see Solomon in Ecclesiastes explain that everything in this world is vanity or as he says, “a chasing after the wind”. Some of our greatest and most loved professionals have succumbed to that spirit of failure.

The spirit of failure is a terrible weight to carry around in life. It cannot be removed by therapy, counseling, or any medication. Many people in this world are weighed down with failure. They feel bad about things they have done, wrongs that they have committed, and no amount of community service, good deeds or any other charitable giving will take away the gnawing in their conscience. The longer sin is carried the heavier the burden becomes and the darker the dungeon. The failures that people carry in their heart and mind can only be washed away by the blood. That's why the writer of Hebrews shouts gloriously to us through his writings in Hebrews 4:16:

“Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.”

Jesus gives us abundance and He frees us from the spirit of failure. Sin separated us from God, but Jesus bridged the gap through the cross. We now have acceptance and even the boldness to approach God. It's because of Jesus we can learn how to dance in the dark dungeon we often feel trapped in.

-We dance because in spite of the darkness life brings us, we know where we are going, and who we are going with.

-We dance because we know in whom we have believed and are persuaded that He is able to do all things for us.

-We dance because we know God is not our enemy, but our Friend, Father, and Faithful provider.

-We dance because we know we don’t have to be looking around for answers, but just look up.

-We dance because we know we can sing in a prison, survive an earthquake, or walk through the fire if necessary. 

-We dance because we know we are not abandoned in the darkness of the dungeon, but walk with victory through Jesus no matter where our journey takes us.

No matter how dark the dungeon gets, put on your dancing shoes. Your failures are behind you-breakthrough is about to happen in your life!

When A Little Success Creates A Big Mess

Nearly everything that could go wrong went wrong after Paul and Silas see Lydia and her whole household get saved and baptized in Philippi.

First, a demon possessed woman follows them around and harasses them all day long.  Secondly, when Paul frees this demon possessed woman all the business people in town get mad because she was the key to their fortunes. Next Paul and Silas were mistreated by the magistrates and were stripped, beaten, and humiliated. Finally, they were cast into jail and placed in stocks. That's what happens when a little success creates an even bigger mess for a child of God.

At this point most Christians would be questioning why all this was happening. Almost nothing had been a blessing, except the salvation of one Gentile lady and her household and one demon possessed woman who found deliverance. I will guarantee you that most Christians would have questioned God more than they would have praised Him.

Some would say maybe God didn’t give them the Macedonian vision.

Some would say they didn't consider all the options when they delivered the demon possessed woman.

Some would say there must be hidden sin in their lives because no matter what they did their situation got worse by the moment.

I've heard all kinds of things said when people start having success in the ministry and their church starts to grow. We are skeptical today about spiritual success because so many people follow a personality rather than a deity. They will follow a man from place to place, but they don't give everything to God because he expects loyalty to Him and His church rather than a personality. Seeing a church grow by attrition rather than new converts only circumvents the whole idea of harvest by just showing increase at some other church's expense. In other words if I only grow a church from other churches members I'm not really doing much. Some will say, "Well, at least we're keeping them in the denomination!", but my question is, did God have them in the first place or was it their carnal attraction to a personality?

We always assume when God gives us a vision to do something it will always be smooth and fruitful by numerical standards, financial status, or turn out exactly as we dream it in our own minds and understanding, but it doesn’t always work out that way. The trouble is rarely the vision, but it is usually how people view the vision against the reality of the situation they are involved in. If Paul and Silas had given up on the vision, then one of the greatest churches in the New Testament would not have come into existence. In fact, since this was a change from taking the Gospel from the east to the west, we today might have seen the whole western world exist in pagan isolation while the East would have been Christianized throughout the middle ages had it not been for their vision.

It’s like the guy who stopped at a full service gas station while on a trip with his wife. After the attendant cleaned his windshield he got mad and told the guy, “It’s still dirty, wash it again!” The attendant politely obliged, after washing it again however the man was still angry and said, “It’s still dirty, don’t you know how to wash a windshield?” Just then the man’s wife reached over and took his glasses off his face and cleaned them with a tissue, and then put them back on his face again, and suddenly he noticed the windshield was sparkling clear! The problem wasn’t the windshield or the attendant; it was the man’s own perspective from his glasses that were the problem-he was the problem.

Yes, a little success can create a big mess when you confront the devil's kingdom. You may face incarceration or become an outcast because you obey the Lord and teach and do what's right. In the end it's not about a personality or individual that drew a crowd, but about someone who saw a vision and did the work that was needed to accomplish it.

Three Questions

Are you living a changed life?

Can you change your lifestyle?

Is it possible to live changed in the spiritual environment our world is facing today?

These three questions are considered over and over in the minds of people who are dealing with conviction regarding their souls. They wonder can a transformation really take place in their hearts that can make a difference in their life, not just for eternity, but here on earth. They also wonder about some of their family, friends, and associates who always seem to fall into the same trap of the enemy over and over. Some know how to play the game so well that they can act changed to get what they need or want and then the same characteristics that enslaved them are exposed again.

We have all honestly given up on people because they cannot seem to do right and stay that way. They seek empathy or sympathy, but make no effort to really live a changed life. They can put on the Christian act so well that they can fool even the most spiritual people. In fact they do it so often that they push away real conviction power because they begin to believe they can never change. They've gotten so good at making excuses and blaming others for what's wrong with their life that the spirit of sensibility seems foreign to them. I believe some have even been turned over to a reprobate mind because of the constant refusal to allow the Spirit of God to bring a true transformation in their life.

They live in the territory of comparison. They justify their behavior by the hypocritical lifestyles of others professing the faith. They convince themselves they're just as good as the next person when it comes to Christianity and that the things that really matter to pleasing people are more important than what matters to pleasing God. I've heard these type stories over and over in my work as a pastor. They would boldly proclaim their own self-righteousness knowing down deep inside there never was a true lifestyle change. I also saw this behavior frequently when someone outside of the faith was wooing someone in the faith. Once they fell in love and married, then the outsiders true personality would show and many innocent people got hurt because of their false testimony.

With all of this in mind let's answer the three questions I asked at the beginning of this blog:

-Are you living a changed life? If Jesus truly lives in your heart and you repented of your sins you are a new creation in Him. You will live a changed life because your thoughts and goals will be different. You will seek to please Him in every area of your life and lived like you mean it.

Can you change your lifestyle? Yes, you can by the grace and mercy of God. The old man spiritually dies, and a new man is birthed through the shed blood of Jesus. You can change your old habits and keep yourself pure in the sight of God. Not in your strength or power, but through and by the power of the Holy Spirit of God.

Is it possible to live changed in the spiritual environment our world is facing today? Oh yes again! He has given you power from on high through the Holy Spirit to conduct yourself orderly and according to His Word and given you abilities beyond your natural ones to face every challenge that you face.

So I exhort you to not give up on the ones who have faked change, denied change, or refused to change. When you've prayed until you can pray no more for them, just hold on. God is about to show up and move in their lives in ways you thought were impossible. He turns fakers, failures, and the faulty into real, successful men and women of God!

Time To Get It Together

In the early 70's the Imperials sang a song entitled, "Time To Get It Together." What a powerful song back then and it's message rings truthfully today in the church and our nation. While one presidential candidate's theme is "Let make America great again", our goal as Christians should be "Let's make the church great again!" Church used to be the most important thing to participate in weekly. Some of the greatest relationships we have were built in churches as we grew up. But just like our nation, many of our churches today have become fragmented and torn by the same tactics the devil has used to divide our world.

Failures of ministry leaders has brought division and mistrust into the body of Christ. Great denominations have compromised their doctrines to accommodate the world rather than stand on the Word. We all say we believe in the same God and the same Word, but many of our churches are facing extinction if something supernatural doesn't happen. I remember David Wilkerson preached a message years ago that prophesied the church would face a crossroads that would decide the future of it's existence. He preached that if we strayed from the Biblical path of The Great Commission to acclimate ourselves to the world we would suffer the consequences of our actions. I believe we are at the critical stage in the history of the church.

Many of the things we do in church are done out of tradition. We don't want to acknowledge that because we say that the Spirit has control of our services. Although when you think about it we almost always do the same thing every week in our services, unless the Holy Spirit does take control. There's nothing wrong with organization, preparation, and practice and we need all of these to put forth our best in our church services. We need it with our worship teams and with our music especially. Still too many have programmed the Spirit out of their services because they keep doing the same things they have done for years that just don't work anymore. In these critical hours of pastoring things are so different and people are so indifferent with each other it is very hard even to keep a spirit of unity in the congregation. Most of that indifference has to do with making changes. Resistance to change of methods or locale has been the downfall of many businesses and may become the downfall of the church as we know it if we are not careful.

Jesus came to seek and to save those who were lost. That means the lowly, the down-trodden, the dirty, the ones nobody wants, and people that just don't fit in. It's the ones that a normal church in America doesn't really want to attend their services. They don't look like us, smell like us, or even talk like us. Their scent is of smoke and alcohol, they have piercings and tattoos in places that you know hurt when they got them, and they use a colorful language that's not Christian. That Biblical path of righteousness Brother Wilkerson preached about that night was not an excuse to exclude people that we say are not typical church people. It was rather that if we didn't fulfill the Great Commission we would lose the anointing that God has placed upon us as a church. If anybody reached out to the unreachable it was David Wilkerson. His ministry was all about reaching people that felt nobody cared about them. His methods for the day were unconventional, but his message was always the same-Jesus loves YOU!

So at this crossroads we must make a decision. So what if the preacher doesn't wear a suit or tie and the music is too loud? If he's preaching Jesus and people's lives are being transformed, he must be doing something right. Who cares if he's traditional or non-traditional? If he's obeying God, living right, and winning souls then God is pleased. If only the yuppies or traditional minded church people are what you want in your church you are missing the mark. The horrible truth is our churches could grow beyond measure if we went after the ones who need Jesus the most, not the one's who make everybody comfortable.

I know of more than one minister who was asked to leave a church or position in a church because they ministered to people who needed the gospel. This is a different America than it was when I was a young preacher. If we don't take the time to get it together we are going to miss out on the greatest harvest field God has ever set before us.

Refuel Or Build New?

There has been a lot of debate lately on whether to refuel and ignite churches that are dying or to plant new evangelistic congregations in their area. It appears to me that the pastors who have served in these areas where the churches are dying need to be consulted to find out the reasons they feel the church needs to closed or replanted. Often times it's not the pastor that is at fault even though he gets the blame. Nor is it jealousy of having someone younger pastor come in to see if they can make a difference. Many times it's because the church doesn't want to do different.

I have seen through the years what causes many churches to lose their vitality. Here are just a few of my thoughts about the debate of closing or reigniting some of those churches:

-Most of the churches in danger of closing have a debt that is hanging over them that the congregation can barely maintain.
Because of this debt they cannot maintain their property, have a full-time pastor, hire the pastor some help, or invest in new ministries that would bring in  new people. As I said in a previous blog, new people are less likely to attend a rundown facility with nasty yards. Statistics show they would go to a nicer-kept leased building than one that appears to be uncared for or rundown. It's not the fault of the present pastor if some committee let that church keep borrowing money just to survive. Some body's got to pay it back sooner or later.

-The spirit of self-possession fills many of these congregation.
That mentality that says, "I've been here through thick and thin" makes them feel they have a right to say who comes in and out of their congregation. That mentality has become so strong today they will even defy their presiding bishops authority even when he tries to help them preserve their congregation. They refuse to move, they refuse to accept change, and they are going to sit there and let their church fall down around their heads. It's that attitude that even a location change cannot make a difference in.

-The controversy of a younger man coming in to help an older pastor bring some new life isn't new.
That's be going on since I've been in the ministry. Before it became as popular as it is today I was asked to come and help breathe life into a congregation back in the 80's. The Senior Pastor had been at the church almost 40 years and the church had a big split and was running half of what they had previously run in attendance. I was in my early 30's and he asked me to pray about it, and if the Lord led me, to come on his staff, help build the church back up, and then the Church Council had already consented I would become Senior Pastor within a year. Through a series of events God put me in that place. The only problem was that when the church begin to come back to it's pre-split status, he changed his mind about retiring, and the whole plan changed.

Since that time I've heard of many a young man in a similar situation say the same thing. They were promised the moon, but ended up being grounded instead. In my humble opinion if a young man does come in expecting certain things or certain promises fulfilled for his sacrifice of service from a Senior Pastor, then they must be honored or the blessings that are happening will begin to dry up. Dissension will set in and the congregation may end up in worse condition that it was in before.

I don't have a dog in the fight, but I can say from experience that if you can't maintain your property, you don't need it. If you can't get along down here with your brothers and sisters, you'll not get a chance up there. So if a church has a history of selfishness, overwhelming financials, and a bad name in the community, it's better to sell, relocate, and seek for revival in that congregation. Changing pastors in some of these areas is just a bandage to a much larger problem. Sadly, in this time in America, we don't want to see any church close it's doors; but if it's never going to recover, it's better to bury it and begin again in a new location. Some churches deserve a second chance, but others have had so many chances and still face the same junk that caused the problems in the beginning. It's time to understand some new things need to be done if the old wells cannot be re-dug.

10 Lessons For A Young Pastor

I learned a lot while I was a pastor. Some of these were good and some were bad. I went through a list of some of those things and came up with this article. I believe that these are the 10 important lessons I learned in 45 years of pastoring:

-I am not a politician. My goal was not to win a debate, but to redeem the heart. I lost  some very good people in my time of serving because I would not agree with them on every issue. Church politics can be as messy as public politics. Your goal as a Christian should be to please the Lord and not let personal issues or private convictions stop you from the main goal-winning the lost for Jesus!

-My public witness was only as authentic as my private integrity. There are times it's easier to blend in with the crowd than stand up against it. When you are by yourself is the time when Satan attacks you the most. Make sure you're prepared to hold on tightly to the hand of God so as not to compromise your identity.

-Great instruction can be found everywhere, but there is no greater source of wisdom than the Bible and no investment that yields greater returns than prayer. Preaching without prayer is powerless. We all can do it, but the Word is much more effective when anointed by prayer.

-I only validated hate when I responded in like spirit. This is a hard one because some church members do all they can to irritate you or cause you pain. It is in those moments regretfully you often fail, but God can restore a right Spirit in you. Arguing gets you nothing but difficulty; hate brings you nothing but sorrow.

-Jesus should never be presented as less than He claimed to be: the way, the truth and the life. I had no problem with this and neither should you. If you are going to preach anything preach Jesus, crucified, buried, and raised triumphantly from the grave. It's a subject that will never fail.

-I lived first and foremost to please a heavenly audience. Quit trying to appease people. You are a leader/servant, but you are living to please Him. You'll never please every person, but you should try to please the Lord in every way possible

-My legacy was not found in things that matter least, but in people who matter most. It's not how many buildings you build, the attendance you run, or the finances you bring in-It's about the individuals you invest in and the return they bring to the kingdom. When I die, only a few will remember me, but those I invested in will carry on the flame of the gospel.

-The generation into which I am born was my calling and it beckoned me to be fully engaged. You cannot just emphasize reaching one age group and let the rest die in vain. Reach the people you have first and then go after the multitudes. Too often we go for the crowd, and forget the ones dying at our feet.

-When Jesus paused while dying on the cross to make certain his mother was cared for, He showed how to prioritize family amidst ministry. If I have any regrets it's in this area. I put church first more than I should and I missed precious time with my family. Pastor, without your family, gaining the whole world means very little. Make sure you have time for them in your schedule.

-Sermons can inspire, but it is love in action that makes the most profound impact. Most pastors can preach a decent sermon, but it's acting on those sermons that turn people's lives around. Preach it well, but live it as well. When they see Jesus through and in you it will make a difference in the words you speak.

As I look to the next generation of ministers I am keenly aware that they will seek to touch a world that is increasingly distracted by obstacles that are far greater than many of us realize. Absolutes will be challenged as those who oppose Biblical precepts become more organized and vocal. Let your strength be in presenting not religion, but a relationship with Jesus Christ. Learn all you can, be all you can, and give all you can to fulfill the greatest calling in all the world.

The Land Of The Unfamiliar

Life is a journey into the unfamiliar. We prepare for known territories, but God swerves the direction and puts us in places we need to be for His glory. I have a dear friend who I've known since we were teens who pastors in Alaska. Why God could take him from the comforts of SC and the familiar to a place thousands of miles from his home and place his wonderful family into the unfamiliar is a mystery to many, but he was obedient and went and God has blessed them together for over 30 years ministry in that unfamiliar territory. It's become home to them now and SC is just a place to visit. It's amazing what God can do when we go into the land of the unfamiliar.

One of my converts in ministry recently moved to a pastorate far from home. He left a great church to go to an even greater one with new challenges ahead. He has never pastored in this new territory before, but allowed God to move him from the safety of a 10 year journey to one in an area he had never been in before. I am very proud of the fact that he took the challenge to make a great church even greater and I expect to hear great things as his work progresses. He chose not to play it safe and stepped into the will of God, whose path lead him far from home, but into the pulpit and ministry the Lord had prepared for him.

If you serve the Lord and have received the call to preach you have to be open to what God says and does. It's not always easy to pack up and move your family or to move away from your family to obey that call. When my dad was called to leave SC to go to Arkansas as State Youth Director it was a challenge. The same when he went to Iowa for the same position 5 years before that. He had to leave the familiar to obey the call of God. During the time he was gone many of his peers received promotion after promotion. It took several years before we were able to come back to SC to the familiar. But I will never forget some of the places we lived or some of the people I met even though I was a child. What an adventure!

Sometimes the journey has some bumps and ditches along the way. The unfamiliar seems so uncharted that we question why God put us there. As we are trying to figure out all the stuff we are facing, those dark areas of the unknown get darker and the pitfalls get deeper. Thankfully with every temptation to give up, the Lord makes a way to escape. He can get us back on course if we leave the driving to Him.

There is a harvest field out there and God needs somebody to glean it. Instead of waiting for some comfortable position to come open to fulfill ministry, take a step into the unfamiliar. Get your stuff together, pray up, and seek the face of God for His directions. If He calls you to go into uncharted waters He will be the wind in your sails. If He calls you to be a spiritual trail blazer, He will give you the tools you need to make a difference. If you fail, it's not because you didn't try or God forsook you. It may be God used you as a doorkeeper for the next visionary to succeed. It's not a glamorous life, but if your prepared to be used by God, something wonderful can happen in the land of the unfamiliar.

Ain't No Big Thing

Discouragement is one of the biggest giants we face in our lives. It affects everyone from time to time, some more than others. Pastors always prepare for a great move of God in their Sunday services and when it doesn't happen that giant comes calling. They've prayed, prepared, and preached with the anointing of God expecting an outpouring of the Spirit. They've also confronted the enemy of our souls head on when they begin to plead for souls in their altar service. When things don't move in the way they expect that giant of depression begins to compress their souls.

On Mondays most pastors face that adversary face to face. They wonder why things didn't come to pass as they thought they would. They often put the blame on themselves because that giant of discouragement tells them that they "missed the mark." Sadly, that giant will put you in a place mentally that is very difficult to overcome. Many won't admit it, but they leave a church too soon because they let discouragement overpower them. In that moment of weakness they make a move they should never have made and then pay for it later in various ways. I've learned that God lets you make bad choices sometimes to show you that when giants come against you, you should be still and wait upon the Him.

Life often faces us with challenges greater than we can understand. Sometimes they overwhelm you, and you don't feel capable of victory. Yet, the story of David and Goliath reveals the power of faith and how it can conquer the biggest giant in your life. David believed in what he said, he saw it in his mind, and it manifested before his eyes. While all of Israel stood discouraged and depressed by the words of Goliath, David spoke words of faith for the promised victory. While the great warriors in their finery cowered in fear, David's words proclaimed the outcome before it happen. Was he a prophet? In some sense of the word you could say yes, but it was his faith in what he said that delivered the giant into his hands.

Our faith tells us all things are possible. It doesn't matter how big, tall or fierce the challenger appears. Others around you may declare there are no answers, but faith says, "Stand still and see the glory of the Lord." Some will say there is no way faith can cause you to see the victory before the fight starts, but faith allows you to see the outcome before you begin. You know that you know that you know, all things work together for the good, and your good is happening to you now regardless of how big the giant of discouragement of depression is.

Jesus said to "have faith the size of a tiny mustard seed, and all things will be possible for you." So look at your situation in a new way and say to your giants: "That ain't no big thing because God is with me, in me, and in charge of all things that come against me."

Deep In The Belly

God often allows a painful situation or a painful circumstance in our life to "swallow us up." That season in our spiritual growth is a holding pattern. We can't move to the left or the right. All we can do is sit. Jonah sat in the belly of that great fish, so God could have his undivided attention. God put Jonah in a holding pattern because He needed to speak to his heart. Jonah was all alone. There were no friends to call, no colleagues to drop by, no books to read, no food to eat, no interference, and no interruptions. He had plenty of time to sit, think, meditate, and pray.

When we're deep in the midst of a difficult situation, God can talk to us. When He has our undivided attention, He can show us things about ourselves that we might not otherwise have seen. Have you ever experienced any of these holding patterns?

-You are sick in your physical body and you have prayed but God has not healed you yet.

-You are having problems with your children and you have put them on the altar, but God has not delivered them yet.

-You have been praying for the salvation of a loved one and they have not been saved yet.

-You are in a broken relationship and you have given it over to God, but it has not been restored yet.

-When doors slam shut before you can knock on them.

When you are deep in the belly of a difficult situation, there are no interruptions. God has your undivided attention. All you can do is sit, think, meditate, and pray. You cannot run from God because there are no mountains that are high enough, valleys low enough, rooms that are dark enough, or places that are hidden enough from Him. It's in that place we must remember to praise Him while we're waiting and remember three things:

-His pattern has a purpose.

-His pattern has a plan.

-His pattern has a process.

So stop struggling and start listening, praying and trusting. He'll keep you right where you are until you can clearly hear Him say, "I love you."

Being Very Serious (Part 53)

We have been taught and have taught that Jesus is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He is immortal, omniscient, and omnipotent. Nothing escapes His view or vision and He is touched by the feeling of our infirmities. Yet, knowing all of this there are still times we feel that God is a million miles away from us. We can't reach out and touch Him tangibly like we do a loved one when fear grips us or something tragic happens. We cannot seem Him visibly with our eyes to know He is there, so frustration grips our hearts and we feel like He's no where to be found.

It is in those moments you have to understand the power of faith and the supernatural comfort it creates. Fear may have knocked you off course, but your faith answered and you realized God hasn't left you. What you become in those moments of doubt is God's gift to you. You are God's melody of life and He sings His song through you. You can never really go where God is not, and where He Is, all is well. He hasn't moved one bit.

No matter what is happening in your life, you know that God is waiting with open arms. He has promised you a safe landing, but not always a calm passage. Do your best for Him everyday and then sleep in peace knowing God is awake 24/7. God has a purpose and plan for you that no one else can fulfill. The will of God will never take you to where the grace of God will not protect you.

You are responsible for the effort put forth, not the outcome. You set your sail, but God makes the wind. Begin to sow and God will give you the seed. When God says "No", it's because He has something better in store for you. The task ahead of you is never as great as the power behind you, so don't try to give God instructions, just report for duty. It's your business to do God's business, and it's His business to take care of your business. Remember, His comfort is not freedom from the storm, but peace in the storm.

So if you're always running around looking for God? He's not lost. If you feel far away from God, remember He hasn't moved.

Being Very Serious (Part 52)

The average size of a traditional church in America is about 75-80 people including children. We all hear of the great, big, mega churches, but most churches in America are small churches pastored by one individual with a possible part-time member on staff. It's the little churches that make up the backbone of our society today. The ladies and gentlemen who pastor these size churches don't have the greatest facilities or massive budgets. In fact most of them struggle to get by financially, but do so with a heart filled with expectancy that God will supply their needs. I remember I was 12 before my dad got a self-supporting church. He always went where he was needed regardless of the size of the church. While it is reported and known that many smaller cities and towns are loosing people to urban areas right and left, the small churches in those areas are still vitally important.

I started pastoring in one of those average churches. After years as an associate minister in 3 large churches with unlimited resources I started pastoring my first church with 32 in attendance, a $200 a week salary, no benefits, and a 6 week old baby. Yet some of the fondest memories of my ministry were created at that little church. When we left there 5 years later we were running well over a 100 in attendance and had remodeled the church and facilities. Those were very prosperous years of learning because I did not despise a small beginning, but accepted the challenge and did what I could for the glory of God.

It is a blessing and cursing at the same time to walk into a prosperous ministry or pastorate. Those who assume the pastorate of a larger church are blessed because numerically and financially they don't have too many struggles materially. Yet they never understand the word sacrifice like the pastors who start off with a very small church. I am not jealous one bit if somebody gets a huge break, but I'm thankful again for those who labor faithfully and diligently in places that few people wanted to go to,  but were called by the Lord to those harvest fields to labor. It's those men and women in small towns, communities, and in the country that do what they can to minister to whomever God puts in their path.

So often the things they do seem as a pastor seem so small. They don't get a lot of recognition or usually serve on a board or committee, however, every single one of them is important in the eyes of God because they obeyed His call on their life and did what many would not do.  Isn't that what the call to preach is all about? God told us to carry the gospel to every creature, so you could sum up the goals of our mission in 3 statements:

-Do what you can then to make this world a better place. Touch the area you are placed in with the love of God and make it better than it was before because of Him.

-Do what you can to share the love of God within you.  It can be as simple as a prayer, a hug, a few dollars offered to help another, or a kind word, a smile, or a wave. 

-Do what you can to win souls for Christ. You might not have the biggest church in town or the nicest building, but people will know you because you share the love of Christ.

In the eyes of Heaven the pastors of average churches are all priceless, with a powerful and eternal message. In the eyes of God they are all beacons of the light to the souls in their communities and they show the love of God in their hearts. Thank you brothers and sisters for our sacrifice.

Being Very Serious (Part 51)

Our General Assembly of the Church of God is going on this week in Nashville, TN. Due to the lingering effects of my stroke I didn't think I would have the stamina needed to attend all the business sessions. My precious son offered to take me, but I had to tell him no. I can still preach and hope maybe to pastor again one day if my complete health returns, but I knew it would be pushing it this time to attend. However, just because I'm not there in person to cast my vote or voice my opinion doesn't mean that I'm any less concerned about the future of my denomination.

Bishops Tim Hill, Raymond Culpepper, J. David Stephens, David Ramirez, and John Childers have been nominated to lead us as our Executive Committee for the next 4 years. David Blair and Rob Bailey have been nominated as our International Youth leaders and David Griffis and just yesterday, Thomas Propes replaced Mitch Maloney as nominees for our World Missions leaders. Their confirmation plus other business and resolutions that come from the completed agenda must also be ratified by the General Assembly on Friday afternoon. Any person who thinks a trip to the General Assembly is a vacation simply means you've never been. There's a lot of work involved for every credentialed minister and delegate who attends the GA that does the job they're supposed to do. If you have watched any of this Assembly by Live Stream then you understand what I'm talking about. Now if we can move to the next step and have internet voting so more of our Bishops, ministers, and laity could express their opinions it would be much appreciated.

Our denomination is faced with some critical situations these days that need guidelines that help us adhere to what we believe. We are to operate our churches and ministries by God's Word, our COG Book of Minutes, and our Declaration of Faith regarding the structure and doctrine of our churches. However, several of our churches don't do this anymore. Apparently some think our GA Book of Minutes and our Declaration of Faith aren't true guidelines any more to direct our churches, just suggestions. We also have those that feel our GA Book of Minutes legislates holiness through legalism rather than relationship. They have replaced the Declaration of Faith with their own ministry statement rather than stand united upon our principles. Just look at some of our leading church's websites and you will see what I'm writing about. I believe each church should have a ministry statement, but nothing should replace our Declaration of Faith.

The COG is a HOLINESS as well as PENTECOSTAL church. I agree that at one time we did emphasize some things outwardly to the point we became legalistic, but then we've pushed the pendulum so far to the other side it seems anything and everything goes today. In a world that is filled with this mentality we are still a PENTECOSTAL church, but to be Pentecostal means we must also be HOLY in lifestyle and practice.. Not holiness according to man's ideas, but according to God' Word. The Bible lists the sins that we must avoid and the lifestyle change we must adapt to after accepting Jesus. Some things we should preach about we don't because they make people uncomfortable. Are we so afraid of losing people that we don't preach about maintaining a holy lifestyle? If we don't emphasize the heart change needed to make us desire to be different then we will never fulfill our last days mission. The lack of conviction in our altar services is beginning to have it's affect on every area of ministry in the church today and we are seeing the results in the lack of evangelism here in America. There's a lot of shouting, dancing, and jumping, but if your heart's not right when that ends the enemy will take over.

Our denomination stands for transformed lives just as the Bible teaches. We're not perfect, but we're striving for holiness before the Lord. We mess up, but if we admit it, God forgives us and restores us. The Word of God has not changed and I understand our GA Book of Minutes is not perfect, but it gives us a solid foundation to help guide our churches forward. If we're to be ONE as a church then we must come to the agreement that our teachings are important and are not just a bunch of guidelines that promote legalism. That is why I pray that our new leadership and future generations of the COG will never forget where we've come from or where we are going and continue to remind us that we are Pentecostal as well Holiness and a mighty army for the Lord.

Being Very Serious (Part 50)

When Becky had her first pacemaker installed in 1983 we went through a very difficult time. It took several months to get it operating right and several trips back and forth to the hospitals in Charlotte and Durham. Those were very difficult days. Shane was just 3 years old, dad had a massive heart attack and was in critical condition, and I was trying to pastor my church. At one point I was in such a tizzy I didn't know what to do. Here we are 33 years later and Becky's still going strong and I'm the one that has a disability. Life can take a strange turn over the years.

Life is filled with ups and downs, joys and tragedies, triumphs and mistakes, laughter and pain, love and heartbreak. One thing is a fact for most of us-we don't always get what we expected our lives to be and for that we should be eternally grateful. I was privileged to serve in many different positions in ministry full-time, work in some of our largest churches at the time, and had the opportunity several years ago to do even more, but I never made it to the top rung of authority in our denomination or served on the State Council. In fact, I never desired to be in any other position than a pastor and God gave me the desires of my heart.

God has always given me what I needed and not what I thought I wanted. Sometimes He allowed me to put myself in places where I had to be totally dependent upon Him. If I had gotten everything I had hoped for I probably would be less thankful today for all of his blessings. Instead God kept me growing, learning, and becoming the person I was meant to be through the trials of life. Life was my school, troubles were my teachers, and the twists and turns of this world were my courses. The classes continue on as well for me, you, and everyone in this world until it's our time to face eternity.

I try not to think these days of what I wanted out of life, but think of what I gave my life for instead as a pastor. I strive today to be a better husband, a loving grandfather, a caring friend, and a good neighbor. I seek to do what I can with what I have to make this world a little more heavenly and to show others that they can do the same. I try to share all the things I have learned these past 45 years of ministry with those that will listen. I learned that God loves us more than we could ever dream, that we can love each other as well, and that when we do so we'll have joy no matter what struggles we may face or losses we may endure.

I challenge you to take some time each day to think about what you can give to life. You are a Child of God with unique talents, knowledge, and blessings. You can give this world so much love and do so much to help others. You can make this world and your soul a little better each day. And when you do so you will get what we all truly want out of life: a good report!

Being Very Serious (Part 49)

In everyday courtesy people would ask me how I was doing, I, like most people, would usually say, "I'm okay." But, later I would realize that within myself things were not fine. Then I'd try to work through the feelings that each situation I was facing created. I didn't always share with others  my feelings or struggles of those times because I felt I would appear weak and most pastors don't want to appear weak.  Yes, I know it's good to vent to a friend once and awhile, but I've learned that I'm better off venting with myself first and acknowledging my feelings or I, like an over-filled balloon, will explode. When I embraced the good and the bad in my life I learned I can work through my struggles and weaknesses much more easily.

It took me a while to figure it out and I still don't have all the answers to some of my questions yet.  I'm not advocating living in your problems, but I'm suggesting that you allow yourself to feel and know when your struggling.  Life isn't always sunshine and roses and if you try to force yourself into believing that very high, unrealistic expectation, you'll eventually explode! I tried for years to make everyone happy, but I learned you can't please some people. You stress out because you feel like a failure when someone finds you have faults. That's why you've got to let some air out of your balloon once and awhile and give it to God. So now I acknowledge and embrace these parts of myself I once denied. I am not perfect and I have flaws. I allow myself to feel hurt and cry and I turn to God for help and guidance and ask for more strength to overcome the struggles.

My heart as a pastor was ripped apart when I saw good people go thru bad circumstances. I hated to see them suffer and I despised the fear they must have felt when they fell apart spiritually, overwhelmed by their weakness. I'm still not okay with this. It hurt then, and it still hurts a lot today when I think about what some had to face during my pastorates. I found as a pastor I couldn't always be the pillar of strength I was expected to be. I lost it sometimes and that sadness and inability to do something about those situations finally caught up with me health wise.  The hardest thing for any pastor to grasp is that we can't always be there without replenishing our resources.  We don't have unlimited strength.  We need time alone to embrace ourselves and our needs as well.  We have to re-charge our batteries so that we can be there for others as much as we can. I had to recognize that I could not do it alone. I was not meant to be the 'Energizer Bunny' because I am human and not God. 

Several years ago when I was pastoring in Union I walked in the nursing home to see one of my precious members who was a patient. She had ants crawling all over her and her bed. You could see a trail of them coming from her window and climbing up the rails of her bed and onto her. I brushed as many away as I could and rushed out into the hall to get a nurse to see the situation. This lady was not neglected by her family, but required the nursing home due to her physical/mental condition. Yet, she was helpless in defending herself against this pestilence. I still have nightmares about this from time to time. I reported it to her family, to the nursing staff, and the administration, but that was all I was able to do. I wanted so desperately to do more, but all I could do was what I had done. I learned during my time as a pastor that I couldn't save the world and everybody in it, that I couldn't get everyone to like me, but I could do my very best to make the world better, even with my limitations.

When life gets too heavy, it doesn't mean you're weak if you admit it. It took a long time for me to get there.  Even tears don't equate to weakness. They are God's way of allowing you to cleanse your soul. I always had this idea that if you can't handle things, you're ill-prepared. That's nuts! That's what God is for-to help us in our weaknesses to become rejuvenated, renewed, and revived.

So, don't be afraid to let the air out of your balloon and cry if you have to. Help if you feel it's needed, but are afraid of doing it. Voice a complaint if you have one. Allow yourself to be human. Let yourself know that you need to recharge once in a while and accept the fact that it's okay to let the injustices you see bother you. More importantly, do something about them if you can. Accept that you get tired and need to nurture yourself, too. If you're running around caring for others, know that it's draining and that there's only so much you can take before your balloon starts to fill too much. Don't punish yourself for needing rest. REST!  Let go of the guilt. Guilt fills balloons very quickly. If a balloon has the right amount of air in it, it's beautiful, light, floating, colorful and vibrant.  If it's deflated or burst it's no good. Deflate sometimes so you can inflate even greater.

Being Very Serious (Part 48)

The worst pain in the world is not from a heart attack or a stroke, but from a lie that has been told about you or to you. Trust and integrity is vital if we are in the ministry or if we claim to be Christians. When that trust is broken by some one who is a peer in your profession or some one you look up too, it shakes the very foundation of what you believe and makes you wonder if everybody is doing it. Lying has become acceptable in life as a necessary evil for survival in the past 25 years. Truth and justice seem to have taken a back seat to vicious gossip and rumors that destroy or damage people's lives and reputations.

Pastors are put in unique situations from time to time. I have joked about it, but I have found myself in situations where I had to be careful what I said or it would have offended someone and caused me great difficulty. In fact, I probably did say some things that I had to repent of not realizing what I was doing until after the fact. There have been times when someone showed me their new born baby and told me how beautiful everybody thought the child was. Down deep inside I thought to myself, "How ugly can you get?" Of course, I couldn't say that out loud so I would try and be kind with my remarks, but then change the subject. Or when someone sang in church and they were in a different key than the musicians and members of the congregation were telling them how wonderful they sang after the service. Sometimes I just wanted to scream, "No-you didn't hear the same person I did!"

Blatant lies put people's lives, ministry, and their future in jeopardy. I've been a victim more than once in my ministry because I trusted in my peers and their statements as truth. It was because of this trust that I put myself in church situations I should never have been in and the stress from them robbed me of my health. I said to my wife even recently, "But these were my brothers in the ministry. How could they do me this way?" I know personally that I'm not the only one that's been in that situation. If you pastor long enough you discover that when someone wants to change churches they will say anything to any official to get out of a mess they have created or inherited. My dad faced this one time in particular in his ministry before he passed. He was asked to switch churches with a pastor who was dealing with a huge mess in his church by an overseer, but my dad was not told about the entire situation. When my dad found out the truth and tried to refuse the move, he was told that there was no backing up or changing his mind. He had to make that move. It was at that church that his health begin to deteriorate due to the situation he inherited.

I know that churches get a bad reputation sometimes because of things they don't know that happened in a moving process. When the new pastor coming in has gotten bad information, inflated stats, or half of a story by someone desperate to move, it changes their perspective when the situation is not what they've been told. I have spoken things in a confidential conversation with some of my peers and then a story begin to circulate that I was preparing to take some one in ministry down. At one church I had a member use my name in a lie to make a younger man think I was going to discipline him, when he was telling the lie himself because he didn't like him. I didn't know anything about the situation until the next week. Dealing with that situation probably brought on my stroke a few days later.

Lying is lying whether you're a minister, member of a church, or claim to be a Christian. The worst lie you can tell yourself is that you can never sin or make a mistake after you get saved. We have people in the COG and in other denominations that think they can talk junk and be justified. I'm not going to pretend to be a saint and say I've never been involved. Yet, I can report that if I did commit a transgression I repented and tried my best not to do it again. The best cure for lying is to be honest with yourself and realize that only by the grace of God is there mercy for any type of sin. The Bible says that all liars shall be condemned to torment for eternity. That's not a place I want to go to and I hope neither do you. Honesty is the best policy, but lying will bring your downfall. You may not get yours in this world, but if you don't repent and stop you'll get it in eternity.

Being Very Serious (Part 47)

Are you optimistic or pessimistic? That is the question of the ages regarding your viewpoint about life. It's all about your perception or the way that you see things. If you are an optimist you see a half full glass. If you are a pessimist you see a half empty glass. The amount of liquid is the same in the glass no matter what your perspective is. It all just comes down to how you perceive it.

The difference between being positive and negative can influence your decision making in such a way to set the tone for your life. Positive people go through negative things, but you would never know it. They see those stumbling blocks as stepping stones rather than obstacles. They find something good even in the bad stuff they have to face. Negative people always let you know the bad stuff first, second, and third. They never see anything good in any situation and their joy is hampered by their inability to see through the darkness and find a shining light.

I pastored one lady who was the most negative person I believe I've ever met. You could feel the atmosphere chill when she walked into the room. Some people thought she was wonderful, but the majority were uncomfortable when she was around. She always complained, fussed about everybody, and refused to accept any change. Things had to be just like she liked them or she would make everyone feel miserable around her. It's alright to have an opinion, but when your opinion drives people away I believe you need to realize you need an attitude adjustment. Sadly, she never did.

Most of your happiness or unhappiness is a result of your perception or by the way you see things.  Just think about these simple things and let your answers tell you what kind of person you are.

-Are problems a challenge that energizes you into action or an obstacle that stops you from further progress?

-Does any new or unexpected situation cause you to be fearful or excited about what opportunities they may bring?

-Does a busy day make you thankful that your life is full and useful, or a reason for you to complain there's not enough time in a day to get everything done?

-Does an unexpected intrusion that interrupts your daily agenda be a source of irritation, or is it quite possibly the most important thing you encounter that day?

-Is a mistake the beginning of a new learning venture or an occasion to berate and punish yourself for your own stupidity?

-Do vacations or holidays become times of anxiety and stress for you and your family or times you seek solitude and contentment in the blessings God has brought to you?

It's not always about what is happening to you, but about the way you perceive it. Just like the Word says, "They meant it for evil, but God meant it for good." I do believe that when Oral Roberts said it years ago he meant it. He would always let you know that "Something good is going to happen to you." Perception or seeing things with spiritual eyes opens the passageway out of bondage into liberty. It opens eyes blinded by lies, bitterness, envy, angst, unforgiveness, and failure to the possibility of a fresh start every day of your life. I'm not saying that you will always be positive, but you will be able to see something good take place in your life in in the worst of times if you see through God's eyes. So let me ask you again are you and optimist or a pessimist? Only you and God know the answer to that!

Being Very Serious (Part 46)

I have done very few weddings in the last 10 years due to changes in society's take on marriage. It seems couples decide more and more to live with each other first before they step into a lawful union. Some even have children and see if they can mesh together as a family. I guess it saves on divorce costs, but it really is hard to accept as the new lifestyle of a family these days. Yet it is a reality we must accept and do our best as ministers to counsel and unify them through the bonds of matrimony even if it's because of unconventional means. One couple whose wedding ceremony I performed has really proven, that even though the started out in that fashion, since marrying they have taken their vows seriously and enlarged their family. They always include their children in every activity and place a special emphasis on them. They've gotten involved in church and given themselves to the Lord. I am so delighted in what they have become as a family unit.

When love is involved in a situation instead of lust it takes over in a special way. I have a great nephew who has some special challenges in his life. When they became known to his biological father, he abandoned him and my niece. Thankfully she has found a good man who has made my great nephew a wonderful father. Not out of obligation, but out of love. It is that kind of love that transforms a house into a very special home for very special people: your family. It's not because you feel obligated or compelled to assume your responsibility; it's because you enjoy building memories together that will last a lifetime. That joy can only come from love.

Money can build a charming house, but only love can furnish it with a feeling of home. Duty can pack a sack lunch, but love decides to tuck a little love note inside. Finances can provide a television set, but love controls it and cares enough to say no and take the guff that comes with it. Obligation sends the children to bed on time, but love tucks the covers in around their necks and passes out kisses and hugs, even to teenagers. Obligation can cook a meal, but love embellishes the table with beautiful flowers and soft candlelight. Compulsion keeps a sparkling house, but love and prayer stand a better chance of producing a happy family. Responsibility gets offended quickly if it isn't appreciated, but love learns to laugh a lot and to work for the sheer joy of doing it. Obligation can pour a glass of milk, but quite often love will add a little chocolate.

When our son and daughter-in-law moved into their present home only three of our grandchildren were born. We had no idea that two more would come into our lives. There was nothing like the first one, then second, and then the third. But in our senior years there's been so much joy being with the last two it's just plain ridiculous. All 5 have brought so much joy to Becky and I and we are so grateful for the family God has given us. And seeing how the three older ones respond to the two youngest proves that love is the most powerful thing at work in our world today. If all of our families would just love one another the world would be a better place. Don't build your house on an unstable foundation-build it on love. You will never see it collapse if you build it right.

Being Very Serious (Part 45)

Why do we glory in some one's failure? If there is a fault in the church world today it's how many people gloat when a man of God fails. It's so sad that we in America forgive politicians, entertainers, and sports heroes, but when a pastor falls we never let him forget his failure nor do we. If the truth be told most of us have never gotten caught doing some of the things that would bring shame and disgrace to the name of Christ. For some reason that seems to be okay because it's us. Yet when a man admits his failures and steps down from his ministry we crucify him and stomp him in the ground.

I don't believe anybody in this recent situation we are facing in Upstate SC has committed a sin unto death, so it is our responsibility to restore him with the understanding it could have been us. I really do feel sorry for those hypocritical people who just go to church to gossip or hear gossip and spread vicious rumors all week long about their pastor, staff, or fellow church members. They always seem to know the other fellows' thoughts and short comings, but are blind to their own. I pastored one church where two family members knew all the rumors circulating about people who had fallen and gladly added their own two cents worth to the conversation, but then couldn't stand to be around each other even though they were related. Now that's a sad fact to swallow.

I have seen the ones that were the loudest in church and acted the most spiritual have tongues like vipers. I have seen the most holy looking people be filled with hatred, bitterness, and a judgmental spirit. I have felt the wrath of people looking for a target to spill over their animosity on and I just happened to be the one standing in their path at the time. It's sad that when someone in leadership sins everyone throws stones at them, except when it's someone they like they want to extend mercy. It just doesn't work that way.

Where sin did abound, grace did much more abound. You may think you'll never need it, but you might when you least expect it. Casting stones is easy, but showing restraint and having a spirit of restoration takes some work. When any leader, worldly or spiritual, falls somebody is affected. No matter what they do there will be an asterisk put by their name by people that refuse to let go of their past.

What if God held on to your past and wouldn't let go? What if He always reminded you of the mistakes that you had made? What if God always clouded your future with your stumbling blocks of yesterday? You would say, "God wouldn't do that because He is God". If we are supposed to be like Him then why do we hold some one's failures over their head? Ask the woman caught in the act of adultery. Ask Mary Magdalene. Ask Peter or any the disciples that ran in fear when His enemies took Him. Jesus is merciful and forgiving so why can't we follow His example? I don't glorify sin or the sinner, but I glorify the Savior who forgives every sin of the fallen.