Apparently, I am not the only one who struggled because of unanswered prayer.
Some of my struggle emerges because I was taught to believe that God is all powerful and that He not only wants me to come to Him like a little child, but also encourages me to ask Him for everything. Hence the struggle when He doesn’t always give us what we want.
This paradox reminds me of a little child at Christmas. They start compiling their gift list in September, and for the next four months, they revise, add to and constantly share it. Yet when Christmas day rolls around, they are filled with dread because experience has shown them that they don’t always get precisely what they requested. Many have said to their parents afterward, “Why bother asking me if you aren’t going to buy me exactly what I want?”
Isn’t this how we feel about our heavenly Father? We tend to have one of two responses when what we asked for is not given in a timely fashion: trying harder or angry blaming.
Let me tell you that trying harder will only get you 4 heart attacks in 4 years. I succeeded only in wearing myself out and spiraling deeper into doubt. None of us can make ourselves worthy of blessings or answers. They can only comes from Jesus.
Angry blaming also leads us into a dead-end. Powerlessness is its own form of suffering. When we’ve run out of other options, anger and blame give us the illusion of control. But it really is only an illusion. It didn’t help my faith, and it certainly didn’t help me find the answers I needed.
Every day, there is warfare being waged for our hearts. The enemy of our soul has an entire arsenal at his disposal, but his most powerful weapon is doubt. Adam and Eve didn’t disobey because they desired the fruit of the tree, but because they fell for the serpent’s lie that God was withholding good things from them. If you ever find yourself doubting God’s love or questioning His character, take a step back and hold to what you know to be true. Expressing gratitude also helps to detour our despair and suffering. Turning our hearts to God in gratitude has the capacity to flip our disappointment upside-down.
Lastly, we must be willing to explore any attachment to entitlement that might contribute to our resentment at how God has answered our prayer. We live in a consumer society and have become accustomed to getting what we want when we want it. Jesus does not promise to give us everything that we want but rather asks us to sacrifice everything—including our own desires for a specific outcome or result. This changes everything when it comes to how we pray.
What if, rather than interpreting God’s “no” or “not yet” as punishment or indifference, we view it as an invitation to be transformed? The possibility that waiting and suffering have the capacity to transform us offers us comfort while crushing our fear of God being fickle. Rather than needing God to answer my accusatory questions of “Why?” I am free to ask, “How can I find You in the midst of this?” This inquiry provides us with the grip and grit we need to move beyond our pain and into the transformation that God has for us.
What if, rather than interpreting God’s “no” or “not yet” as punishment or indifference, we view it as an invitation to be transformed? For us to avoid these and other unhelpful responses when our prayers aren’t answered the way we’d hoped, we need to zoom out and glimpse the larger story.
Every day, there is warfare being waged for our hearts. The enemy of our soul has an entire arsenal at his disposal, but his most powerful weapon is doubt. Adam and Eve didn’t disobey because they desired the fruit of the tree, but because they fell for the serpent’s lie that God was withholding good things from them. If you ever find yourself doubting God’s love or questioning His character, take a step back and hold to what you know to be true. Expressing gratitude also helps to detour our despair and suffering. Turning our hearts to God in gratitude has the capacity to flip our disappointment upside-down.
Lastly, we must be willing to explore any attachment to entitlement that might contribute to our resentment at how God has answered our prayer. We live in a consumer society and have become accustomed to getting what we want when we want it. Jesus does not promise to give us everything that we want but rather asks us to sacrifice everything—including our own desires for a specific outcome or result. This changes everything when it comes to how we pray.
What if, rather than interpreting God’s “no” or “not yet” as punishment or indifference, we view it as an invitation to be transformed? The possibility that waiting and suffering have the capacity to transform us offers us comfort while crushing our fear of God being fickle. Rather than needing God to answer my accusatory questions of “Why?” I am free to ask, “How can I find You in the midst of this?” This inquiry provides us with the grip and grit we need to move beyond our pain and into the transformation that God has for us.
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