So in dealing with a person who has a bad attitude does the truth always prevail? I can honestly say, "No", but somehow you will survive the situation even if you don't understand why God let's you go through it.
I can't reveal too much about this situation that I went through, but I believe I can give you a brief capsule of what went on and the struggle that I had dealing with it. I had someone commit suicide that was affiliated with my church. This situation could have been avoided if the folks involved would have listened and followed through with my advise the weekend before this happened. They had come to Becky and I for an escape from a bad situation and through God's help the door was opened. All they had to do was walk through it. However, from that scenario came a lie that caused conflict in my church and eventually a division that caused me to loose about 40 people. Even when the person confessed they had lied about the chain of events the damage was already done. I lost people that I had loved for over 7 years as their pastor. It was all that I could do not to develop a bad attitude then.
But the kicker came just a few years later. I read a story about the situation in a national publication of our church and then heard the testimony from one of the individuals involved at a state meeting about the event that was a total lie. I knew the truth of the whole situation and so did my wife and church, but there was one of the main individuals involved telling a story that was a complete and utter lie about the loss they had to deal with of their child. It was all I could do to restrain myself and not leave from the sound booth where I was working during that meeting. None of the sordid details that had been shared with us that lead to the event were exposed in either the publication or the testimony. It was as though they believed the lies they were telling as truth and expressed them as such.
I was mad, frustrated, and grieved at the same time. Because of having to deal with that situation, I had to leave a church I never thought I would leave and my faith in human beings was shaken to the core. And when I heard details expressed about the event that were lies in that meeting as truth, I thought to myself, "God, You know the truth. How can any parent say what they were saying that was completely opposite of what really happened?" The person involved was even paid to speak at the event.
There was no mention of the mental abuse or threats received by the individual that took their life. The speaker at the meeting/the writer of the article never shared any of the things they had shared with Becky and I when asking us to help them find a way out before something tragic happened. It was just like the truth had never happened, the plan to leave the abusive relationship had not taken place, and the person died in vain.
I had to repent after that meeting. In fact, I believe that was one of the last meetings of that nature that I ran the sound at. My family's whole life was affected by that situation and so was my church, but here was one of the main individuals involved made to look like a saint. We knew the truth, but let's face it, sometimes the truth does not win out.
I must admit even writing about this stirs me up today, but here's the point I want to make. I know the truth, God knows the truth, and one day there will be a day of accountability. Have I failed people before? Yes, I readily admit that. Have I made wrong decisions before? Absolutely. Have I been a perfect pastor all the time? No, because you can see by my other two answers I am not perfect. I can promise you that I have never tried to hurt anyone intentionally or misrepresent the truth. I don't want to believe a lie or tell one that will affect peoples' lives for a lifetime. So I have to make a choice when something like this happens-either let it get the best of me or put it in God's hands.
(Continued tomorrow)
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