Two men met at a bus stop and struck up a
conversation. One of them complained of family problems.
Finally, the other man said, "You think you have family problems? Listen. A few years ago I met a young widow with a grown-up daughter, and we got married. Later my father married my stepdaughter. That made my stepdaughter my stepmother and my father became my stepson. Also, my wife became mother-in-law of her father-in-law. Then the daughter of my wife, my stepmother, had a son. This boy was my half-brother because he was my father's son, but he was also the son of my wife's daughter, which made him my wife's grandson. That made me the grandfather of my half-brother. This was nothing until my wife and I had a son. Now the half-sister of my son, my stepmother, is also the grandmother. This makes my father the brother-in-law of my child, whose stepsister is my father's wife. I'm my stepmother's brother-in-law, my wife is her own child's aunt, my son is my father's nephew and I'm my own grandfather. Now - tell me about your family problems."
I don't know if sorting out your family is a problem. A bigger issue for many of us is that we want more from family life than just knowing who's who, and more than we're presently getting. One of the most common complaints I hear from families is that they are not as close as they used to be. They may be close in proximity, but still not feel close as a family due to divorce, separation, or loss in a household. They may live next door to one another or even in the same house, but feel more like strangers today than they ever have before.
Families today should value closeness and work hard to keep anyone from feeling left behind or forgotten. Again, closeness is not so much about distance, but about the attitude we have toward each member of our family. We may live far apart from one another, so we need a willingness to do what it takes to keep our relationships close. Everyone feels closer when they feel understood, loved, and can look forward to time they can spend together with other family members. No one wants to feel left behind or forgotten.
Finally, the other man said, "You think you have family problems? Listen. A few years ago I met a young widow with a grown-up daughter, and we got married. Later my father married my stepdaughter. That made my stepdaughter my stepmother and my father became my stepson. Also, my wife became mother-in-law of her father-in-law. Then the daughter of my wife, my stepmother, had a son. This boy was my half-brother because he was my father's son, but he was also the son of my wife's daughter, which made him my wife's grandson. That made me the grandfather of my half-brother. This was nothing until my wife and I had a son. Now the half-sister of my son, my stepmother, is also the grandmother. This makes my father the brother-in-law of my child, whose stepsister is my father's wife. I'm my stepmother's brother-in-law, my wife is her own child's aunt, my son is my father's nephew and I'm my own grandfather. Now - tell me about your family problems."
I don't know if sorting out your family is a problem. A bigger issue for many of us is that we want more from family life than just knowing who's who, and more than we're presently getting. One of the most common complaints I hear from families is that they are not as close as they used to be. They may be close in proximity, but still not feel close as a family due to divorce, separation, or loss in a household. They may live next door to one another or even in the same house, but feel more like strangers today than they ever have before.
Families today should value closeness and work hard to keep anyone from feeling left behind or forgotten. Again, closeness is not so much about distance, but about the attitude we have toward each member of our family. We may live far apart from one another, so we need a willingness to do what it takes to keep our relationships close. Everyone feels closer when they feel understood, loved, and can look forward to time they can spend together with other family members. No one wants to feel left behind or forgotten.
Here are 10 ways to help keep closeness and appreciation for your relationships within your family:
-Treat your family members in a way you would like to be treated.
-Let them know that they are priority in your life and always will be.
-Set aside time to remember as a family both the good and hard times. -Show appreciation for the good things that they do and have done.
-Don’t let jealousy over a family member’s success cloud your relationships.
-Be available if possible in a time of crisis or need.
-Resolve any conflict with mutual understanding. Don’t let it fester.
-Be glad when a loved one fulfills their dreams.
-Pray one for another. Even though it’s just a saying, prayer still works.
Cherish every moment you can spend with your family. In the long run, you will be glad that you did.
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