Welcome to the blog of Pastor Alton Stone, from Simpsonville, SC. Pastor Stone is a retired Ordained Bishop of The Church of God, Cleveland, Tennessee with over 45 years of pastoral ministry.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

If College Students Wrote The Bible


  • The Last Supper would have been eaten the next morning -- cold.
  • The Ten Commandments would actually be only five -- double-spaced and written in a large font.
  • A new edition would be published every two years in order to limit reselling.
  • Forbidden fruit would have been eaten because it wasn't cafeteria food.
  • Paul's letter to the Romans would become Paul's email to abuse@romans.gov.
  • The reason Cain killed Abel: they were roommates.
  • The reason why Moses and followers walked in the desert for 40 years: they didn't want to ask directions and look like freshmen.
  • Instead of God creating the world in six days and resting on the seventh, He would have put it off until the night before it was due and then pulled an all-nighter.

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