Welcome to the blog of Pastor Alton Stone, from Simpsonville, SC. Pastor Stone is a retired Ordained Bishop of The Church of God, Cleveland, Tennessee with over 45 years of pastoral ministry.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Humor Week-If You Love Somebody


    1. THE ORIGINAL VERSION:
      If you love something,
      Set it free...
      If it comes back, it's yours,
      If it doesn't, it never was yours....
    2. THE PESSIMIST VERSION:
      If you love somebody,
      Set her free ...
      If she ever comes back, she's yours,
      If she doesn't, well, as expected, she never was.
    3. THE OPTIMIST VERSION:
      If you love somebody,
      Set her free ...
      Don't worry, she will come back.
    4. THE SUSPICIOUS VERSION:
      If you love somebody,
      Set her free ...
      If she ever comes back, ask her why.
    5. THE IMPATIENT VERSION:
      If you love somebody,
      Set her free ...
      If she doesn't comes back within some time limit,
      forget her.
    6. THE PATIENT VERSION:
      If you love somebody,
      Set her free ...
      If she doesn't come back, continue to wait
      until she comes back ...
    7. THE PLAYFUL VERSION:
      If you love somebody,
      Set her free ...
      * If she comes back, and if you love her still,
      set her free again, repeat *
    8. THE LAWYER'S VERSION:
      If you love somebody,
      Set her free...
      Clause 1a of Paragraph 13a-1 in the second
      amendment of the Matrimonial Freedom Act clearly states that...
    9. THE STATISTICIAN'S VERSION::
      If you love somebody,
      Set her free...
      If she loves you, the probability of her coming back is high
      If she doesn't, your relationship was improbable anyway.
    10. THE POSSESSIVE VERSION:
      If you love somebody
      don't ever set her free.
    11. THE MBA VERSION:
      If you love somebody
      set her free...
      instantaneously...
      and look for others simultaneously.
    12. THE PSYCHOLOGIST'S VERSION:
      If you love somebody
      set her free...
      If she comes back, her super ego is dominant
      If she doesn't come, back her id is supreme
      If she doesn't go, she must be crazy.
    13. THE FINANCE EXPERT VERSION:
      If you love somebody
      set her free...
      If she comes back, its time to look for fresh loans.
      If she doesn't, write her off as an asset gone bad.
    14. THE MARKETING VERSION:
      If you love somebody
      set her free...
      If she comes back, she has brand loyalty
      If she doesn't, reposition the brand in new markets.

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