Welcome to the blog of Pastor Alton Stone, from Simpsonville, SC. Pastor Stone is a retired Ordained Bishop of The Church of God, Cleveland, Tennessee with over 45 years of pastoral ministry.

Monday, January 10, 2011

12 Things To Do When It Snows

-Fall Down.

-Make a snow angel while wearing very few clothes on and tell your friends you like the numb feeling.

-Feed snow to your dog, cat, or other pets.

-Insist on wearing all white in order to “Blend in” with the other “snow people”.

-Let snowflakes accumulate on your head, then run inside Wal-mart Screaming, “Give me the best dandruff shampoo you got, pronto!”

-Bury your sister or brother in it. Just put a marker there so you can find them again.

-Say the words, “Winter Wonderland” everytime you refer to the snow.

-Chain your dog to the grill of your truck/car and refer to your vehicle as a dogsled.

-Make whimsicle comments like, “I wish I had snowshovels for hands”.

-Make an enormous snowball, then gun it at one of your cows at point blank range. NOTE: if you do not have a cow, this will also work on other animals and some humans.

-Always yell “BONZAI” when sledding down a large hill.

-When trying to find your way home during a heavy snow, refer to home as Desert Command and your vehicle as Eagle 1, while refering to yourself as Snow Fox

No comments:

Post a Comment