Wounded (Part 2)

Perceived rejection is where a person receives something as rejection when it really isn't. For example, "Why is that person not coming over here to talk to me?" When the person may not be trying to reject you, but just feel shy at the time in stepping out and meeting you or anybody else for that matter. People who have spirits of rejection can have a tenancy to receive perceived rejection, because the purpose of a spirit of rejection is to make us feel rejected.

A person who feels like God is always angry at them usually has issues of rejection. Perceived rejection can also make a person feel as if God has rejected them. This is a very common scene that we encounter in the deliverance ministry.

A good example of rejection, which caused feelings of envy, jealousy, and even hate to surface in King Saul can be found in 1 Samuel 18:7-11:

"And the women answered one another as they played, and said, Saul hath slain his thousands, and David his ten thousands. And Saul was very wroth, and the saying displeased him; and he said, They have ascribed unto David ten thousands, and to me they have ascribed but thousands: and what can he have more but the kingdom? And Saul eyed [literally meaning that he looked with jealousy upon] David from that day and forward. And it came to pass on the morrow [the next day], that the evil spirit from God came upon Saul, and he prophesied in the midst of the house: and David played with his hand, as at other times: and there was a javelin in Saul's hand. And Saul cast the javelin; for he said, I will smite David even to the wall with it. And David avoided out of his presence twice."

First, we see the women praising David for slaying his ten thousands, but Saul for slaying his thousands. This rejection made Saul angry with David, and jealous of him. The very next day, an evil spirit came upon Saul and caused him to become exceedingly angry, to the point of attempting to murder David! Now there's some ugly fruit that all started with rejection. It wasn't rejection that opened Saul up to the evil spirit, but rather his reaction to his rejection.

The same is true when a person becomes stubborn or rebellious, or any other ungodly reaction to rejection. The rejection isn't the sin, but their reaction can be a serious sin. This can open the person up to unclean spirits, and lead them down the path of destruction. God's Word puts stubbornness and rebellion, for example, in the same category as witchcraft and idol worship!

1 Samuel 15:23 "For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry. Because thou hast rejected the word of the LORD, he hath also rejected thee from being king."

The root of rejection is actually incredibly simple: damage from rejection is the result of a misplaced identity. Whenever we base our identity on somebody or something other than what God's Word has to say about us, we make ourselves vulnerable to the damage of rejection. Many of us will base our identity on what our parents, teachers, or friends think of us. This sets a lot of children up for Performance Orientation bondages later in life, because their parents give them conditional love based on their grades or performance.

Think about these things:
-What or who defines who you are?
a. your job?
b. what your parents thought or think of you?
c. what your friends think of you?
d. how well you perform in the workplace?
e. how much money you have?
f. how good of grades you get?
g. what you think of yourself?
h. how physically strong, fit, or tall you are?

When you die, will those things continue to define who you are?

Rejection and rising above rejection is all about identity and what you base your identity upon. The key to overcoming rejection, is to solve the identity problems.
Let's say that you are basing your identity on what your mother and father think of you. Now the moment that any hint of disapproval comes from them concerning you, that is going to hurt because they are the source of your identity. Anytime we base our identity on what we think of ourselves, or what others think of us, we are virtually trusting that person with our identity. We aren't capable of truly determining who we are; only God is qualified for that job. That is why it is absolutely vital for us to understand the person that God has made in us, and who we are as new creations in Christ Jesus. We were never made to live apart from God or base our identity on the things of this world.

When we base our identity upon what the Word of God has to say about us, we will become virtually rejection-proof. We can become immune from the wounds of rejection as long as we are not basing our identity upon what another person thinks of us.