-Any technical problem can be overcome given enough time and money. However, you are never given enough time or money.
-If you ask your husband to pick up five items at the store and then you add one more as an afterthought, he will forget two of the first five.
-The first place to look for anything is the last place you would expect to find it. It will not be in the last place you expect to find it.
-The less important you are to the corporation, the more your tardiness or absence is noticed.
-The pay raise is just large enough to increase your taxes and just small enough to have no effect on your take-home pay.
-Insurance covers everything except what happens.
-As soon as you start doing what you always wanted to be doing, you'll want to be doing something else.
-There are no answers, only cross-references.
-Any food that starts out hard will soften when stale. Any food that starts out soft will harden when stale.
-The part requiring the most consistent repair or replacement will be housed in the most inaccessible location.
-If there are two possible ways to spell a person's name, you will pick the wrong one. If there is only one way to spell a name, you will spell it wrong anyway.
-The candy bar you planned to eat on the way home from the market is hidden at the bottom of the grocery bag.
-When leaving work late, you will go unnoticed. When you leave work early, you will meet the boss in the parking lot.
-The job that pays the most will be offered when there is no time to deliver the services.
-Some people manage by the book, even though they don't know who wrote the book or even which book it is.
-You never get away, you only get someplace else.
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