Things You Don't want To Hear In Surgery

Things you're glad you didn't hear during surgery . . . .

1. Wait a minute, if that's his spleen, then what's this?
   
2. Hand me that...uh...that uh...thingie.
   
3. Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?
   
4. Could you stop that thing from beating? It's bothering my concentration.
   
5. What's this doing here?
   
6. I hate it when they're missing stuff in here.
   
7. Somebody call the janitor -- we're going to need a mop.
   
8. I sure wish I had my glasses.
   
9. Well folks, this will be an experiment for us all.
   
10. Oh no!  I just lost my Rolex.
    
11. Sterile, shmerile. The floor's clean enough.
    
12. What do you mean he wasn't in for a sex change?!
    
13. Anyone see where I left my scalpel?
    
14. Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?
    
15. What do you mean you want a divorce?!