The hurting church is not an occasional dilemma. More and more we find people who have been hurt deeply within the family of God, leaving them worn and exhausted. More and more we find leaders in conflict within the body of believers, robbed of the joy Jesus promised in Him. When we find this hurt hanging on to our own bruised soul, it can make us want to leave the church and sometimes even want to “back burner” our God who seems to have allowed it all.
Sadly, we have come to accept that this is the way church is. There is an epidemic of fractured believers out there and we have actually come to accept this as the norm. So we either stay away and let our hearts become cold or we put on our Sunday best, call “forward march” and implement a new vision or program and hope the problems will just go away. The hurt in individual hearts and churches gets buried until it gets bumped again.
Can we break this cycle that happens over and over in heart after heart, and church after church?
I am continually amazed at the simplicity of God’s Word and the direct instructions He shares with us. The Father’s heart toward us, His children, is so open and loving as He instructs us in living in the day-to-day challenges of rubbing shoulders where the rubber meets the road.
The steps God gives us are simple, though not necessarily easy. They are steps that can help us move from being reactive in conflict to becoming proactive in guarding our hearts and our churches. And, as steps always do, they will take us to higher ground where we can live above disunity and confusion.
The framework these steps are built on is love. Love is also the handrail that helps move us along from one step to another. Without love, the steps move us from the fulfillment of right living that God calls us to, to self- righteous living, which is hollow and void of the power of the Holy Spirit. God says our trademark will be love. “By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” (John 13:35)
Sunday, April 7, 2013
Saturday, April 6, 2013
I'm not the perfect pastor
The perfect pastor preaches exactly 10 minutes.
He condemns sin roundly but never hurts anyone's feelings.
He works from 8 AM until midnight and is also the church janitor.
The perfect pastor makes $40 a week, wears good clothes, drives a good car, buys good books, and donates $30 a week to the church.
He is 29 years old and has 40 years experience.
Above all, he is handsome.
The perfect pastor has a burning desire to work with teenagers, and he spends most of his time with the senior citizens.
He smiles all the time with a straight face because he has a sense of humor that keeps him seriously dedicated to his church.
He makes 15 home visits a day and is always in his office to be handy when needed.
The perfect pastor always has time for church council and all of its committees. He never misses the meeting of any church organization and is always busy evangelizing the unchurched.
The perfect pastor is always in the next church over!
If your pastor does not measure up, simply send this notice to six other churches that are tired of their pastor, too.
Then bundle up your pastor and send him to the church at the top of the list.
If everyone cooperates, in one week you will receive 1,643 pastors.
One of them should be perfect.
Have faith in this letter. One church broke the chain and got its old pastor back in less than three months.
He condemns sin roundly but never hurts anyone's feelings.
He works from 8 AM until midnight and is also the church janitor.
The perfect pastor makes $40 a week, wears good clothes, drives a good car, buys good books, and donates $30 a week to the church.
He is 29 years old and has 40 years experience.
Above all, he is handsome.
The perfect pastor has a burning desire to work with teenagers, and he spends most of his time with the senior citizens.
He smiles all the time with a straight face because he has a sense of humor that keeps him seriously dedicated to his church.
He makes 15 home visits a day and is always in his office to be handy when needed.
The perfect pastor always has time for church council and all of its committees. He never misses the meeting of any church organization and is always busy evangelizing the unchurched.
The perfect pastor is always in the next church over!
If your pastor does not measure up, simply send this notice to six other churches that are tired of their pastor, too.
Then bundle up your pastor and send him to the church at the top of the list.
If everyone cooperates, in one week you will receive 1,643 pastors.
One of them should be perfect.
Have faith in this letter. One church broke the chain and got its old pastor back in less than three months.
Friday, April 5, 2013
Waiting On A Special Occasion
If you are waiting for a special house guest or a special occasion to use something you cherish in your house, consider the following following article by Ann Wells that appeared several years ago in the Los Angeles Times:
My brother-in-law opened the bottom drawer of my sister's bureau and lifted out a tissue-wrapped package. "This," he said, "is not a slip. This is lingerie."
He discarded the tissue and handed me the slip. It was exquisite; silk, handmade and trimmed with a cobweb of lace. The price tag with an astronomical figure on it was still attached.
"Jan bought this the first time we went to New York, at least eight or nine years ago. She never wore it. She was saving it for a special occasion. Well, guess this is the occasion."
He took the slip from me and put it on the bed with the other clothes we were taking to the mortician.
His hands lingered on the soft material for a moment, then he slammed the drawer shut and turned to me. "Don't ever save anything for a special occasion. Every day you're alive is a special occasion."
I remembered those words through the funeral and the days that followed when I helped him and my niece attend to all the sad chores that follow an unexpected death.
I thought about them on the plane returning to California from the Midwestern town where my sister's family lives. I thought about all the things that she hadn't seen or heard or done. I thought about the things that she had done without realizing that they were special.
I'm still thinking about his words, and they've changed my life. I'm reading more and dusting less. I'm sitting on the deck and admiring the view without fussing about the weeds in the garden. I'm spending more time with my family and friends and less time in committee meetings.
Whenever possible, life should be a pattern of experience to savor, not endure. I'm trying to recognize these moments now and cherish them. I'm not "saving" anything; we use our good china and crystal for every special event--such as losing a pound, getting the sink unstopped, the first camellia blossom. I wear my good blazer to the market if I feel like it. I'm not saving my good perfume for special parties; clerks in hardware stores and tellers in banks have noses that function as well as my party-going friends.
"Someday" and "one of these days" are losing their grip on my vocabulary. If it's worth seeing or hearing or doing, I want to see and hear and do it now. I'm not sure what my sister would have done had she known that she wouldn't be here for the tomorrow we all take for granted. I think she would have called family members and a few close friends. She might have called a few former friends to apologize and mend fences for past squabbles. I like to think she would have gone out for a Chinese dinner, her favorite food. I'm guessing--I'll never know.
It's those little things left undone that would make me angry if I knew that my hours were limited, angry because I put off seeing good friends whom I was going to get in touch with--someday. Angry because I hadn't written certain letters that I intended to write--one of these days. Angry and sorry that I didn't tell my husband and daughter often enough how much I truly love them.
I'm trying very hard not to put off, hold back, or save anything that would add laughter and luster to our lives. And every morning when I open my eyes, I tell myself that the day is special. Every day, every minute, every breath truly is ...a gift from God.
Life is a precious gift from God, and he wants us to get the most out of it. Jesus came to give us life "to the full and abundantly" (John 10:10). In other words, he came so that we would live our lives abundantly-full of purpose, meaning, and joy.
What are you waiting for? If it's a special occasion or a "someday,"--- keep in mind that it may never come.
My brother-in-law opened the bottom drawer of my sister's bureau and lifted out a tissue-wrapped package. "This," he said, "is not a slip. This is lingerie."
He discarded the tissue and handed me the slip. It was exquisite; silk, handmade and trimmed with a cobweb of lace. The price tag with an astronomical figure on it was still attached.
"Jan bought this the first time we went to New York, at least eight or nine years ago. She never wore it. She was saving it for a special occasion. Well, guess this is the occasion."
He took the slip from me and put it on the bed with the other clothes we were taking to the mortician.
His hands lingered on the soft material for a moment, then he slammed the drawer shut and turned to me. "Don't ever save anything for a special occasion. Every day you're alive is a special occasion."
I remembered those words through the funeral and the days that followed when I helped him and my niece attend to all the sad chores that follow an unexpected death.
I thought about them on the plane returning to California from the Midwestern town where my sister's family lives. I thought about all the things that she hadn't seen or heard or done. I thought about the things that she had done without realizing that they were special.
I'm still thinking about his words, and they've changed my life. I'm reading more and dusting less. I'm sitting on the deck and admiring the view without fussing about the weeds in the garden. I'm spending more time with my family and friends and less time in committee meetings.
Whenever possible, life should be a pattern of experience to savor, not endure. I'm trying to recognize these moments now and cherish them. I'm not "saving" anything; we use our good china and crystal for every special event--such as losing a pound, getting the sink unstopped, the first camellia blossom. I wear my good blazer to the market if I feel like it. I'm not saving my good perfume for special parties; clerks in hardware stores and tellers in banks have noses that function as well as my party-going friends.
"Someday" and "one of these days" are losing their grip on my vocabulary. If it's worth seeing or hearing or doing, I want to see and hear and do it now. I'm not sure what my sister would have done had she known that she wouldn't be here for the tomorrow we all take for granted. I think she would have called family members and a few close friends. She might have called a few former friends to apologize and mend fences for past squabbles. I like to think she would have gone out for a Chinese dinner, her favorite food. I'm guessing--I'll never know.
It's those little things left undone that would make me angry if I knew that my hours were limited, angry because I put off seeing good friends whom I was going to get in touch with--someday. Angry because I hadn't written certain letters that I intended to write--one of these days. Angry and sorry that I didn't tell my husband and daughter often enough how much I truly love them.
I'm trying very hard not to put off, hold back, or save anything that would add laughter and luster to our lives. And every morning when I open my eyes, I tell myself that the day is special. Every day, every minute, every breath truly is ...a gift from God.
Life is a precious gift from God, and he wants us to get the most out of it. Jesus came to give us life "to the full and abundantly" (John 10:10). In other words, he came so that we would live our lives abundantly-full of purpose, meaning, and joy.
What are you waiting for? If it's a special occasion or a "someday,"--- keep in mind that it may never come.
Thursday, April 4, 2013
7 Ideas for How to Deal with Change
Ready for more joy and a greater sense of well-being and fulfillment? Follow the ideas below.
-Simply notice that you are in the midst of change and that change is a part of you.
This might seem like a no-brainer, but it takes some practice to become aware of change instead of subconsciously denying it. Don't try to run and hide. If you have a journal, write about changes you notice.
-Face your feelings about the change, especially when the change is imposed and beyond your control.
Get past "Why me?" "But I don't want to!" and "It isn't fair!" Figure out what your fears or worries are. That takes work. You don't have to be a victim, even when you are not in control of the change. Write about your feelings.
-Figure out when to accept and when to reject the change.
Have you heard the serenity prayer? Reflect on what you are accepting, what you are rejecting, and what you are doing something about. You will be amazed at how effective your choices are.
-Adopt an attitude of anticipation, and be grateful.
Welcome change as an opportunity. Find the benefit somewhere in the change. There is always a benefit and an opportunity. Start by keeping a written record for 3 days. Every day, note 3 things, large or small, that you are grateful for. You will notice a more powerful attitude of anticipation growing (hey! that might be a nice change!).
-Choose your thoughts and attitudes about each change.Negative thoughts block your creativity and problem-solving abilities.
Positive thoughts build bridges to possibilities and opportunities. Keep a record of the choices you make in your thoughts and attitudes.
-Learn to relax (more).
Deep breathing works for many people. Exercise helps most of us to relax. Choose the way that works best for you. Relaxation allows you to deal well with change.
-Set smart goals so you can consciously guide the change.
Smart goal setting helps you decide how to make the change happen and to recognize your successes. Write out your goals and your plans to meet them.
-Simply notice that you are in the midst of change and that change is a part of you.
This might seem like a no-brainer, but it takes some practice to become aware of change instead of subconsciously denying it. Don't try to run and hide. If you have a journal, write about changes you notice.
-Face your feelings about the change, especially when the change is imposed and beyond your control.
Get past "Why me?" "But I don't want to!" and "It isn't fair!" Figure out what your fears or worries are. That takes work. You don't have to be a victim, even when you are not in control of the change. Write about your feelings.
-Figure out when to accept and when to reject the change.
Have you heard the serenity prayer? Reflect on what you are accepting, what you are rejecting, and what you are doing something about. You will be amazed at how effective your choices are.
-Adopt an attitude of anticipation, and be grateful.
Welcome change as an opportunity. Find the benefit somewhere in the change. There is always a benefit and an opportunity. Start by keeping a written record for 3 days. Every day, note 3 things, large or small, that you are grateful for. You will notice a more powerful attitude of anticipation growing (hey! that might be a nice change!).
-Choose your thoughts and attitudes about each change.Negative thoughts block your creativity and problem-solving abilities.
Positive thoughts build bridges to possibilities and opportunities. Keep a record of the choices you make in your thoughts and attitudes.
-Learn to relax (more).
Deep breathing works for many people. Exercise helps most of us to relax. Choose the way that works best for you. Relaxation allows you to deal well with change.
-Set smart goals so you can consciously guide the change.
Smart goal setting helps you decide how to make the change happen and to recognize your successes. Write out your goals and your plans to meet them.
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
Change Is Hard
Change is so hard that most of us avoid it at all costs. But by avoiding change, we create even bigger problems, such as lost opportunities, broken relationships, or sometimes a wasted life. Millions of people who need to change are drifting along with no real purpose, no joy, feeling as if they're traveling a dead end street. Each time we need to make a change, fear attacks because we don't know what is coming. Like most people, we like predictability and thrive on sureness. Change means stepping into the unknown and losing your comfortable routine, and that creates fear.
Sometimes we even have to give up control and that's frightening as well. Sure, you prepare as well as you can, but you can't run everything. Change involves so many factors that you just can't manipulate all of them. When you're not in control, you lose your sense of invulnerability. You quickly realize you're not as powerful as you thought. That bravery you put so much pride in seems to evaporate when you realize you're not the one in charge any more. Family members and friends can help you change, but they have their own lives to lead and their own priorities. They can't do everything for you. Most of the time they're struggling so much in their own lives that they can't give you all the support you'd like.
God supplies everything you need for successful change, and when you make changes with his help, you stay changed. The unknown can overwhelm you, but God is omniscient, which means he knows all things, including the future. He can prepare you for the future in ways you can't prepare yourself, and he works all things for the good of his followers. God is the guide who is never surprised.
God is in control as well. The being who created the vast universe and keeps it operating in perfect harmony is also a personal God who intervenes in people's lives. He exercises his control to keep those who obey him in his will. When you feel weak in the face of change, God is omnipotent, or all-powerful. Knowing the invincible God is on your side gives you tremendous confidence.
The most important attribute God brings when you're making a change is his unconditional love for you. Unlike that of family and friends, his love never wavers. He wants only the best for you, and when change makes you suffer, as it often does, he stands closest to you, giving comfort and strength. Sometimes his love is the only thing that gets you through.
Change is very hard, but God sure does make it easier.
Sometimes we even have to give up control and that's frightening as well. Sure, you prepare as well as you can, but you can't run everything. Change involves so many factors that you just can't manipulate all of them. When you're not in control, you lose your sense of invulnerability. You quickly realize you're not as powerful as you thought. That bravery you put so much pride in seems to evaporate when you realize you're not the one in charge any more. Family members and friends can help you change, but they have their own lives to lead and their own priorities. They can't do everything for you. Most of the time they're struggling so much in their own lives that they can't give you all the support you'd like.
God supplies everything you need for successful change, and when you make changes with his help, you stay changed. The unknown can overwhelm you, but God is omniscient, which means he knows all things, including the future. He can prepare you for the future in ways you can't prepare yourself, and he works all things for the good of his followers. God is the guide who is never surprised.
God is in control as well. The being who created the vast universe and keeps it operating in perfect harmony is also a personal God who intervenes in people's lives. He exercises his control to keep those who obey him in his will. When you feel weak in the face of change, God is omnipotent, or all-powerful. Knowing the invincible God is on your side gives you tremendous confidence.
The most important attribute God brings when you're making a change is his unconditional love for you. Unlike that of family and friends, his love never wavers. He wants only the best for you, and when change makes you suffer, as it often does, he stands closest to you, giving comfort and strength. Sometimes his love is the only thing that gets you through.
Change is very hard, but God sure does make it easier.
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
Can you change?
How do you make changes in you life that last forever?
You decide to make a change and then you just do! Does that sound like a huge oversimplification? Well, it's not. It really is that simple. When the pain is great enough and you're tired of being unhappy, you simply wake up one day and decide to change your life forever.
People say every day that they're going to do things differently and become a different person, but very few people actually ever make those changes. You can make those changes today. You can be the change you want to see in the world. Remember that you can't do things differently until you see things differently. Your perspective will make the difference in the changes that you make.
Don't misunderstand me. It's not easy to make changes and not everything will necessarily improve, but you will be much happier if you make them. Anyone who expects to be happy all day every day may be expecting way too much, but if you are inherently dissatisfied with your life, you can change. You don't have to live this way forever. It can be anything from a simple change to a complete overhaul. Sometimes a simple change like doing volunteer work is enough to make you feel like you're giving something back and making a difference. Some changes may need to be a little more extensive to feel like you are becoming the person you were always meant be and fully reaching your potential. Whatever the case may be, it can be done if you want it badly enough.
Life is too short to spend your time being unhappy and adding to a long list of regrets. Put fear aside, really evaluate what you want out of life and how best to get it, and then go for it! You only get one go around, so do what you need to be satisfied with your life.
You decide to make a change and then you just do! Does that sound like a huge oversimplification? Well, it's not. It really is that simple. When the pain is great enough and you're tired of being unhappy, you simply wake up one day and decide to change your life forever.
People say every day that they're going to do things differently and become a different person, but very few people actually ever make those changes. You can make those changes today. You can be the change you want to see in the world. Remember that you can't do things differently until you see things differently. Your perspective will make the difference in the changes that you make.
Don't misunderstand me. It's not easy to make changes and not everything will necessarily improve, but you will be much happier if you make them. Anyone who expects to be happy all day every day may be expecting way too much, but if you are inherently dissatisfied with your life, you can change. You don't have to live this way forever. It can be anything from a simple change to a complete overhaul. Sometimes a simple change like doing volunteer work is enough to make you feel like you're giving something back and making a difference. Some changes may need to be a little more extensive to feel like you are becoming the person you were always meant be and fully reaching your potential. Whatever the case may be, it can be done if you want it badly enough.
Life is too short to spend your time being unhappy and adding to a long list of regrets. Put fear aside, really evaluate what you want out of life and how best to get it, and then go for it! You only get one go around, so do what you need to be satisfied with your life.
Monday, April 1, 2013
April Fool's Day Medicine-Top 50 Oxymorons
Top 50 Oxymorons
Act naturally
Found missing
Resident alien
Advanced BASIC
Genuine imitation
Airline Food
Good grief
Same difference
Almost exactly
Government organization
Sanitary landfill
Alone together
Legally drunk
Silent scream
British fashion
Living dead
Small crowd
Business ethics
Soft rock
Military Intelligence
Software documentation
New York culture
New classic
Sweet sorrow
Childproof
"Now, then ..."
Synthetic natural gas
Christian Scientists
Passive aggression
Taped live
Clearly misunderstood
Peace force
Extinct Life
Temporary tax increase
Plastic glasses
Terribly pleased
Computer security
Political science
Tight slacks
Definite maybe
Pretty ugly
Twelve-ounce pound cake
Diet ice cream
Rap music
Working vacation
Exact estimate
Friendly Fire
And the Number one top OXY-Moron,
Microsoft Works
Act naturally
Found missing
Resident alien
Advanced BASIC
Genuine imitation
Airline Food
Good grief
Same difference
Almost exactly
Government organization
Sanitary landfill
Alone together
Legally drunk
Silent scream
British fashion
Living dead
Small crowd
Business ethics
Soft rock
Military Intelligence
Software documentation
New York culture
New classic
Sweet sorrow
Childproof
"Now, then ..."
Synthetic natural gas
Christian Scientists
Passive aggression
Taped live
Clearly misunderstood
Peace force
Extinct Life
Temporary tax increase
Plastic glasses
Terribly pleased
Computer security
Political science
Tight slacks
Definite maybe
Pretty ugly
Twelve-ounce pound cake
Diet ice cream
Rap music
Working vacation
Exact estimate
Friendly Fire
And the Number one top OXY-Moron,
Microsoft Works
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